I am 100% behind the fight for the rights of players from years past being remunerated with appropriate benefits (including extended health insurance and increased pensions)… I'm one of them myself.  However, I don’t believe taking money for incoming rookies via a scaling of the bonuses and salaries is the way it should be done. We (retired and current veteran NFL players) were all rookies at one point in time. My question to everyone is “was there a rookie salary cap when you were drafted, or signed as a free agent?” The answer is an obvious NO! The other question is “did you and/or your agent negotiate the highest level contract you could get monetarily at that time?” Therein, I’m sure the answer is YES! Everyone who enters the NFL does so knowing that there are many inherent risks to playing the sport of football.

Throughout the years one of the only protections any of us has had against these risks has been the singular area of guaranteed benefit we knew we would receive upon signing our contracts: that being whatever signing bonuses or guaranteed money we were able to negotiate on our initial deal. Nothing else is promised to us within the mythical “contracts” that we signed to play in the National Football League. I use the term mythical because we do not have bilaterally guaranteed contracts as the other professional sports leagues do. The papers we agree to sign as National Football League players would be termed better as “Agreements IF!” In other words, you will receive whatever you were able to negotiate IF the team feels you have performed up to the potential of your draft position at all times; IF you don’t get hurt; IF your skills don’t wane too quickly; IF you don’t engage in conduct deemed detrimental to the league (from as simple as taking weight-loss pills to as controversial as dog-fighting); IF no one comes along whom the team evaluates as better than you are at your job; IF you’re still considered worthy of your weekly check each Tuesday at 4PM EST during the season; etc. These unilateral deals are heavily loaded in the favor of NFL teams for the exact purpose for which the current Rookie Salary Cap proposal is purposed: To mitigate the potential economic damages of a mistake with a player signing, thus making funds available to distribute amongst those more deserving.

As a player who left the game having suffered several of the injuries for which I knew I was at risk when I first donned the shoulder pads and helmet as a bright-eyed 5 year old, I’m here to say that a Rookie Salary cap is NOT the answer to the failure of the NFL owners to manage their businesses properly; or take care of their past employees.  In the case of the "Legacy Players" these are men who set the groundwork to make the industry what it is today… During my NFL career I persevered through a knee reconstruction (ACL, MCL, and meniscus); a broken leg; many ankle sprains; chronic hamstring pulls; several (unreported) concussions; and finally a fracture to my C5 & C6 vertebrae that forced me to retire under the ridiculously inferior “Line-of-duty” disability benefit. My signing bonus as a 6th Round draft pick (#156 overall) in the 1993 draft was $36,000. The salaries that followed for the next four years were $100,000; $135,000; $178,000; and $215,000 respectively. Therein, besides my share of playoff money during my rookie year in which I was able to enjoy a trip with the Kansas City Chiefs to the AFC Championship game, that signing bonus was the largest single check that I received. In the 2009 NFL Rookie Draft the equivalent pick (#156) signed a deal for 4-years that totaled $1.93Million; with a $180,600 signing bonus. This increase would amount to about a 10.5% APY over the 16-year period. Now, with the increases in league revenue being exponential I’d venture to say that this rise in bonus money is appropriate.  Teams that owners purchased for under $200 million dollars during a similar time-span are today worth in the neighborhood of $1 Billion.  Additionally, the annual revenues of the league have skyrocketed to $9 Billion; and the popularity is at an all-time high.  How on earth does this equate to economic difficulty for this industry.  Unless, of course, the people in charge are saying that they are mismanaging the revenue.

On a personal note, there are a number of factors that went into why I didn’t get MY big payday. But the primary one that makes the biggest difference is that I suffered that knee injury requiring reconstruction during my second year in the league. Prior to that injury I had prototypical athleticism, speed, and explosion; to go along with my unique 6’3” and 220lb. frame. Prior to the draft I had some of the best college production and measurables for the safety position. But choosing to go to Howard University instead of a football powerhouse was enough to raise doubts; or at least provide excuses. That is until of course I got on the football fields in the NFL and proved to be quite the talent. So much so that just prior to the referenced knee injury I had taken over the starting Strong Safety duties going into the first game of the 1994 season. However, wouldn’t you know that the career changing play occurred on the opening kickoff and I never got to enjoy the fruits of the labor that had earned me that starting job. This, my friends, gives me perspective that the young men who are able to get larger contracts up front HAVE earned the rights to them just as we did; because they have the same intrinsic risk of it all ending any day on any play that we did as well. I was able to play on as a journeyman for several more seasons and observe guys careers end before mine who were drafted higher than me; while watching some others drafted lower than me go on to play extended careers while enjoying the rewards of a “Big” contract or two. I applaud the men who were able to set themselves up to be drafted higher than me; as well as the ones who were able to overcome the odds from lower entry levels. To me this speaks of how the chips fall in such a dangerous sport. Not whether or not someone is more deserving.

I certainly don’t understand how we would use the other sports leagues as a barometer for instituting a Rookie Salary Cap; unless we’re going to seriously consider, and ask for, the other “benefits” of their contracts. The most important being that these ARE actually contracts that the owners must adhere to whether or not the player pans out to be whom/what they expected him to be. I share this facetiously; as I know it will never happen under the current “system.” The NFL is the ultimate “Good Ol’ Boy” network made up of many owners, administrators, coaches, and scouts who have never even put on a football uniform at a high level. Not to mention having a sense of relativity to the demands of doing it in the National Football League. So the current way of doing business with non-guaranteed contracts allows them to continue on without the level of practical expertise employed by the other sports leagues (i.e. the NBA, MLB, and NHL). It’s unlikely that you will find a coach or scout in either of these leagues who hasn’t played his relative sport at a high level. Conversely, in the NFL, it’s just as unlikely to find one who has. So in order for the NFL to continue the system of hiring brothers, sons, friends, and friends of friends, they need the contingency of the non-guaranteed contract to make up for their inability to evaluate and/or develop talent properly.

The players (past and present) have been hoodwinked into fighting on the wrong battle fields.  The owners are creating division within the ranks to weaken what could be a united approach to a resolution.  A few years back I was commissioned to speak to football players at several colleges on the importance of taking advantage of their opportunity for an education; and how important it would be to their futures. There were statistics gathered during my research that opened my eyes to just how rare and special a place NFL veterans hold in the football annals. Additionally they serve as the catalysts for the passion with which I share this post. The information uncovered was as follows:

Of the 20+ million kids playing on the youth fields annually, only 1.2 million make it to high school football. Of this number, only 54,000 make it to college football. And from this group of athletes, only 1,800 grace the NFL fields annually. Though a startling sifting of the talent pool, these numbers were not the most enlightening to me. What stuck out the most was that of the 15,000 men who had played in the NFL over the past 20 years, only 631 did so for more than 3 seasons.

So it is extremely important that players are able to have guarantees in their first contracts, as chances are they won’t get another one. This whole situation appears to me like we (NFL players current and past) are once again being treated like “dumb jocks” and pitted against each other to fight on different sides of what should be the same argument: BETTER COMPENSATION AND BENEFITS FOR EVERYONE. However, we are allowing wealthy businessmen who have made hundreds of millions of dollars (and in some cases billions) to defer the responsibility of taking care of their businesses and legacy employees by taking away from their current ones. Did anyone bother to ask how much of an increase the owners have enjoyed over those years? It is not the responsibility of rookies to give up the same opportunity we had to negotiate the best deals just because WE realize that we were represented poorly on the other side of the negotiating table (by past players association leadership). The deal players (past and present) need to negotiate is between us and the billionaire owners; not to the detriment of the prospective or current millionaire athletes. When we are able to gather all our troops on the appropriate side of this battle, I promise you that the scales will then be tilted to win in the end.

God Bless,

 

Tim

Phil 4:13

The premise for our discussion was the foundational motto of my coaching practice: "We must clearly identify our Inspirations in order to Achieve our Aspirations." We as human beings are innately guided more by our inspirational/emotional drivers that attribute to our activity than we are the practical ones. So, the "Why we do" is more meaningful to us than the "What we do." Unfortunately, many of us have never taken the time to clearly define and prioritize those drivers. So as we set out on our life's journey, we may end up with different degrees of success; but not necessarily that which would equate to our personal sense of it. If we have truly identified our motivations and what success would look like to us, then we are more apt to persevere through the guaranteed challenges of life in order to get there.

A major distinctive that was shared during the call is being sure to set quantifiable objectives in contrast to the oft used (but subjective) setting of ambiguous goals. In order to identify achievement, the achievement itself must be measurably identifiable: Examples-"I'm planning to have an awesome day coaching." vs. "I plan to meet with 5 coaching clients today." The first phrase is a subjective goal, while the second is a quantifiable objective. My definition of awesome may not be the same as yours; so we have not effectively communicated if I can't quantify what will make the day awesome for me. Therein, we can not establish a plan for success that is so filled with subjective levels of accomplishment that whether or not we have reached them is dependent on someone's opinion, rather than a statement of fact. However, the construct of personal opinion that weighs heavily in our cultivation of success is the foundational principle shared during the call that will allow us to formulate our life's plan. That being our personal opinion of that which motivates/inspires us to action. These are our "Proactive Attributions to Success" (PATS). I use acronyms often, and like PATS in this case because the esteem (pats on the back) we have for ourselves is more impactful than the esteem offered to us by others.

Our PATS are those values that we can deliberately identify as the reasons we do whatever it is we do. I have categorized them in a manner that allows you to come up with your own prioritized order of their place in your life. The categories are all encompassing. No matter how trivial or pertinent the activity; we can connect our reasoning for doing it to one or more of the PATS Values listed below:

Faith- Our moral and/or spiritual belief system that guides us to do what we feel is right.
Family/Friends- Important people in our lives with whom we value spending time.
Fortune- All of our material possessions and/or money.
Fun- Includes our leisure time interests and/or hobbies.
Fame- Is our recognized achievements and/or status.

Throughout our lives we make most of our choices based upon these inspirational or emotional drivers. So we must answer the following quandaries: “How well do we know ourselves?" and "How conscientious are we about staying true to ourselves if we do?"

During the call I shared tangible applications I have for exercising this discovery; and for staying focused on our prioritized PATS and objectives once discovered:

The first resource I have created are UPLIFT Values Cards. These come in sets of five laminated cards that each (along with various UPLIFT insignias) have one of the PATS Values on one side; and a brief definition on the back. I use these for PATS Values discovery exercises during coaching sessions; as well as in my personal relationships. I also carry a set around in my pocket daily (in my prioritized order of course); as do many of my clients. The portability of the cards allow for fluidity of our list in the case where life changes necessitate a change in priorities. However, they still serve as a guide of accountability and consciousness of that which inspires our journey to continue on despite the obstacles. If you would like to receive a set (normally retails for $4.99+ S&H) send a message with your contact information to my Inbox. All I ask is that you cover the materials cost and shipping (a total of $2.00).

The second resource is something you create yourself: The PATS Board. This is a personal tangible "accountability partner" that serves as a daily visual of our Prioritized PATS. You can be as creative as you would like to be in building your PATS board. This has been extremely useful for me and my personal clients. I shared the makeup of my PATS Board with the call participants. The materials are a framed cork board (24 X 36), cut-out craft letters/words, and pictures. With the craft letters I created the title "Tim's PATS Board" at the top of the cork board. I then placed the words of my prioritized list in order vertically below the title; but with enough space to insert my photographic representations of what each means to me. I used a cork board, because just as may be the case in UPLIFT Values Cards exercises, my prioritized list may change as my life circumstances change; so I must be able to make adjustments when needed. I truly believe in planning for success. We won't stumble upon it; and it doesn't occur by accident. We need tangible road maps to follow towards our clearly quantifiable objectives. However, these plans will never get us to our full potential without a heartfelt commitment from the practitioner of the activities. Our realized and prioritized PATS will provide the needed tug on our "heartstrings."

For those of you who attended the call, you probably recognized the order in which I have the PATS listed within this article as my personal prioritized list. The list is just that though; MY LIST. It will guide MY PATH towards reaching MY OBJECTIVES successfully. Each of you must do the same thing in order to truly actualize your full potential and become ALL you were called to be in this life. The what you do will always have different influences and meanings to different people. But the WHY you do it can never be diminished by outside influence. You are the author of this free will decision. So make sure that "You clearly identify your Inspirations in order to Achieve your Aspirations.

"Honesty isn't the best policy; It's the only policy" has become a nice cliche that we use, but is it really applicable to all situations? It is my belief that in a relationship with confirmed existence of the essentials (GOD, LOVE, RESPECT,FAITHFULNESS, HONESTY, INTEGRITY, LOYALTY, and TRUST) discernment, sensitivity, and empathy are the BEST POLICIES in executing them; and must be used concurrently. Funny how we ask some questions to which we already know the "real" answer. We're just asking to get what we want to hear, not necessarily what is the solution. Conversely, there are matters of importance that need to be sorted out and agreed upon HONESTLY before a relationship ever gets to the advanced stages.

Discernment is a special quality; and is essential for relationships to avoid unnecessary squabbles. Real friends and lovers understand the fundamental attribution of executing sensitivity and empathy well enough to distinguish between essentials and non-essentials. The former is where we practice honesty only. We all have an intrinsic desire for acceptance. Therein, we at times will assimilate the desires of another individual in order to be accepted by them. However, we're destined for trouble when we communicate an acceptance of that in which we know we don't intend to follow through; or is contrary to our character/values. Two prime examples which lead to huge issues later: (1) Agreeing that you would like to have kids just because he/she said he/she did; but you really don't; or (2) As a Christian you partner yourself with a non-Christian. Honesty is mutually pertinent regardless of which person you are in each of these scenarios.

Conversely, in the non-essentials we are given liberty to be a comforter; even in cases where that for which we are providing comfort is trivial. This is a strength of a naturally amiable person; and an absolute area of weakness for the analytical. No wonder the innate differences in the handling of emotional issues between women and men. Amiable traits are found most often in women; and analytical ones in men. So while the woman just wants her man to listen to her vent and provide a shoulder on which she can cry; men are continually interrupting to provide the solution to her problem. Acceptance and a degree of sacrifice is needed from each side. Both parties must be intentional in order for a relationship to prosper. This is not a directive to be deceptive or dishonest; but to know when to replace all that you could say with those considerate things that you should say.

HONESTY must be practiced with DISCERNMENT, SENSITIVITY, and EMPATHY in order for a relationship to thrive. Regardless of the intent though, with NO GOD, there will be NO LOVE. However, if we KNOW GOD, we will KNOW LOVE and have the ability to practice our HONESTY within our relationships through His filter. Now be fruitful and multiply.

Had an interesting dialogue on a post from a friend today.  The original question is from a male friend of hers.  A point of note is that this dialogue is taking into account relationships in which the couple believes sex within a committed relationship is permissible (married in a legal since; or otherwise united).  I thought it worth sharing (names not included to protect the innocent! :

 

Original Question From inbox: I need an honest opinion. I also believe that great sex is healthy for a relationship, but how much is too much? I'm more of a 3 to 4 times a day guy. But what if your mate prefers once a day. What is a good compromise that way both are happy. Help everyone!

 

My Response:

The most important question here is what type of relationship is this? Marriage or still Dating? From there they can come up with the proper solution. If they're married, then this is NOT the time to find out that they are sexually incompatible... How on earth did they ever fall in love? Sex is a huge part of a healthy relationship. However, it needs to be mutually satisfying for both partners. This includes frequency, prowess, etc. The compromise must be from both if this is discovered after making the ultimate commitment.

 

Conversely, if they are still dating, the somewhat harsh but most appropriate solution is for them to part ways and each find someone who is more sexually compatible!

 

Her Response:

Tim: you think that the sex life at the beginning of a marriage is the same sex life you will have throughout the marriage?

 

Different things come in to play that will change the desires of a woman work, kids, and age.

 

Not being on the same page on sex I don't feel is a cause to end a relationship.

 

I really don't know any couple personally who have the same sex drive

 

My Response:

I believe that many things change in relationships for various reasons: sex drive being one of them... However, changes in circumstances don't qualify changes in one's character...A truly IN LOVE couple doesn't let kids, careers, or any other ancillary aspect of THEIR relationship get in the way of their passion for one another. That's the reason we are to make sure we know to whom we are really committing in all areas of compatibility. That's a prime example of meeting someone's personality, and over time we get to know their character. Too many people put on fronts of who they are (including sex drives) in order to impress someone they like. Facades can't last forever though. So eventually the real YOU is revealed.

 

Relative to the second point, I do feel that a pre-marital romantic relationship with sexual incompatibility should end. Love relationships are not a business arrangement. Hence the descriptor "LOVE!" If you lack compatibility in one of the most essential areas of your passion (sexual intercourse), then you are setting yourself up for a life of compromise. We are human beings and fallible in every sense of the word... So we're asking for trouble if we think we can build a solid and lasting love relationship around perpetual compromise! There are 6.8 Billion people on earth (300+ million in the US alone)... Why not find someone compatible with you?

 

Her Response:

Tim: say they are married and everything else is great should he leave her because one area is off? If not how can he help her increase or how can he decrease?

 

By the way thank you for commenting.

 

My Response:

My reference for the couple who discovers this after marriage is that they MUST work out the compromise and NOT end the relationship. It's the couple who discovers it pre-marriage that should each find another appropriate mate.

 

Her Response:

OK now how does he begin to help on the sex drive of his wife

 

My Response:

First and foremost, the question is does SHE want "help?" If she is content with her sex drive then he'll have to compromise... However, if it's just a matter of regaining the passion that they once had, then it's time for him to romance the passion back in their marriage. Ask him how do they interact now... Are there playful touches throughout the day? Does he open doors for her (including car doors)? Does he buy flowers for her for no particular reason? Does he write her love notes/poems? Does he speak lovingly to her at ALL times?

 

Yeah... All the mushy stuff! It amazes me how many men want a FLOWER, yet treat their wives or girlfriends like THORNS!

 

Her Response:

Tim you are hot I am scared to touch for I am going to get burned.

 

That is so important and men must understand that sex is in the mind of a woman not in the physical

 

My Response:

Well I had to learn this most important lesson the hard way through an incompatible 15-year marriage of perpetual compromise. We were great "Business Partners" and co-parents to our kids; but never really lovers... I'm a hopeless romantic with southern chivalry inbred in me; so that was NOT the life meant for me... I needed someone who speaks lovingly to me; and to whom it's easy to speak lovingly...  It took the ultimate relationship failure though for me to gain the greatest life lessons and wisdom I have today. Fortunately, I now get to not only share it in my called profession; but use it personally in my own relationship as well (with an appropriately compatible and wonderful woman)!

 

Her Closing:

Thank you everyone I know this helped the ones who are in need of this information.

 

I wholeheartedly agree!

As a Lifestyle Coach and Motivational Speaker I've had hundreds (maybe even thousands) of opportunities to mentor/guide others on dating, marriage, or just general relationship etiquette.  What I've found interesting is the relative consistency of the particular choice of friends whom most men and women utilize to share their relationship issues and receive advice.  My specific reference is to the sex of the chosen "Relationship Confidants!"  Well, as may be the expectation men most often choose other men; and women likewise other women.  We are certainly creatures of habit.  Unfortunately though, habits continue in good, as well as bad choices.  Relative to relationships, it would behoove us all to break habitual trends that aren't accomplishing the intended results.

I share this preliminary information as the premise to how most of us answer the question that begins this post.  We tend to choose a confidant to whom we can relate.  One area of that relativity we seem to often grasp is "same sex."  Relativity is certainly an important trait for a trusted adviser.  However, the element most of us seem to miss is to whom the adviser (Relationship Confidant) should relate.  The analyst I've become today wonders why I ever thought my male friends served as the best Relationship Confidants regarding the complexities of women: including the underlying meaning behind certain behaviors; and of course how best to express myself lovingly.  This is not something I've learned quickly or easily.  It actually cultivated in me approximately twenty years before my "light bulb" moment.  If you haven't figured out where this is going I'll skip through the chase and get to the point.  I, over the years, have received the most useful, relevant, and truthful advice on women from women.  Unfortunately for me, I needed a few hard falls in relationships over this period to accept the wisdom within the 20/20 vision hindsight provides.

My first opportunity to accept this advice would have probably saved me the biggest heartache I experienced as a young man: the failure of the relationship with my college sweetheart.  This was my "first love."  Prior to college I was so focused on my life objectives that I didn't even venture into serious girlfriend territory.  I continued the same approach at college initially.  Therefore, my first year was strictly about football and school.  Any social "activities" were fun only... nothing serious.  Well, that changed my second year when I met who I thought was the love of my life.  We had the proverbial whirlwind romance; with many of the usual (and some maybe not so usual) relationship ups and downs.  My point in sharing this though is that prior to the start of this relationship I had already established a few really strong male and female friendships at college.  As you might surmise, by the time I met my college girlfriend during my Sophomore year, my friends had a pretty decent grasp on WHO I WAS!!!  I would share the normal relationship stuff with both my male and female friends.  The guys seemed to always have a similar perspective to mine; whereas the ladies would have information that made me think.  One of my female friends in particular who actually spent a considerable amount of time with my girlfriend and I shared things with me that ring loudest and most relevant to this commentary today.  She never had a negative thing to say about my girlfriend.  She would primarily tell me what I needed to be doing to be pleasing to her, based on the type of person she observed my girlfriend to be.  The advice she shared was not difficult to do; and I was not unwilling to do it.  However, my error was in listening to mine and my boys' perspectives' who felt I didn't NEED to do it.  This was my first experience with the common relationship mistake of sincere love misdirected.  In other words, when I didn't consistently express the love language of the one I loved, she didn't feel loved.  My female friend saw something I didn't.  Her last bit of advice to me was that my girlfriend would break my heart if the relationship continued on the way it was... Unfortunately for me, she was right!

My personal experience above, although painful at the time, served as a period of growth.  It took a couple more huge failures to see as clearly as I do today.  I thank God for the experiences.  Without them I would not have the wisdom and understanding with which I've been blessed.  Therein is the openness to receive instruction from the fairer sex (and particularly so in relationships).  That is not to say that the same sex friendships lost their value for me.  I believe we should all establish confidant level relationships with both sexes.  However, what I learned most about what has been shared with me by my female friends is that my number one "Relationship Confidant" to provide ME useful, relevant, and truthful advice on MY relationship with MY WOMAN is MY WOMAN! 

Yes, communication within the relationship is the key.  My mom put it best in some advice she shared with me about the strength of her and my father's marriage: "Make sure SHE is your best friend," she said, "No third party should know anything about your relationship that you don't both know first!"  Men ask your woman how to love her; and  women ask your man how to love him!  Our foremost "Relationship Confidant" is at home.  I'm blessed to know that mine is... So like never before, I now get to express and enjoy AMAZING LOVE!  Ladies and Gentlemen you too can experience the same.

People often ask me "How is it that I can have a positive attitude ALL THE TIME?"  Most don't think it realistic to be so optimistic.  Well the simple explanation is that I put all trust in God that regardless of my circumstances (good or bad), he has my best interest at heart, even when I screw things up (Romans 8:28)!  However, there is also an even more practical reason that He has given me understanding to transfer to anyone of any faith base:

 

We’ve all heard the phrase “your attitude determines your altitude.”  This holds true in every aspect of our lives.  The most catalytic element for what kind of day we will have is the attitude with which we begin our mornings.  This vital element will be evident in our expressions, our voices, and our body language.  Being positive is worth it’s weight in gold.  Conversely, negativity will almost always yield congruent results.  It will deplete your energy and distort your perception of the opportunities life has to offer. A positive outlook on the other hand, will help keep you motivated to cultivate your crafts and continue toward achieving your objectives.  The key is focusing on our sphere of control, rather than our sphere of concern.  The fact is, life will always inject those things in which we have little to no control.  However, we can control our reaction to unforeseen circumstances.  It starts with a positive attitude.  If you can believe it, you can certainly achieve it.

One of my FB Friends and UPLIFT fans had a very interesting query on her page for which I felt compelled to provide a response. I received permission from her to share our dialogue, as I thought others of you might benefit from the information as well:

 FB Friend-LaCharo: Ok FB fam, I just had a real deep discussion with a friend/co-worker. OK she says she loves this guy and when I asked what about him she loves, she said, 'I don't know, I just love him'!

 So I'm asking, 'shouldn't you have some sort of reason for loving somebody'?!

 My Response:Very interesting conversation you took part in LaCharo... Your friend may have discovered the essence of true LOVE! Love does not exist as a principle of reasoning. It should never possess a targeted attribute. In other words we are to love holistically. Targeted attraction is the reason you LIKE something or someone; and in the process of cultivating a relationship we may (or may not) fall in love... Which, by the way, has no time-line on it's occurrence. It could literally take place at first sight; or over a number of years. LOVE, however, never exists because of anything; but in spight of everything! The only way you know you are in a love relationship is if the ONENESS is still present at the other person's worst; just as it is at their best!!!

 FB Friend-LaCharo:Hmmnnnn, wow! That's deep. She just all smiles and just says, 'I just love him'! I like the way you explain it!

 My Response: Now for the qualifying principle (as you see that I referenced LOVE and falling IN LOVE): These are separate "connections" that may or may not exist concurrently. The first you can have without the second (so we can love without being loved)... However, the second requires that the first exists reciprocal between two individuals!

  FB Friend-LaCharo: Oooh, so perhaps she justs loves him and is not in love with him! Ok, so now explain being in love. Is there reasoning required for being in love?!

 My Response: LaCharo... Reasoning is an absolute necessity for being IN LOVE! We each have our own love language/languages through which we are fulfilled as it relates to the Romantic or most specifically stated Eros Love contained within an IN LOVE relationship. Included are WORDS OF AFFIRMATION, SPENDING QUALITY TIME, RECEIVING GIFTS, ACTS OF SERVICE, and PHYSICAL TOUCH. When we are IN LOVE, we take the time to discover and express the love language/languages of our mate; knowing that they will reciprocate the same. It takes two selfless individuals to successfully be in and sustain an IN LOVE relationship! Conversely, there is no way we can be in love if our love language is not being expressed to us!

-U.P.L.I.F.T. Ministry-

 I chose the acronym UPLIFT because it defines biblical reconciliation. A common theme throughout the New Testament is that as believers we are reconciled to God and one another through Jesus Christ. The following breakdown of the individual words of the aforementioned acronym provides better insight and clarity as to its relevance to this ministry:

 

-United- We as Christians have become members of the one body through Jesus Christ. Thus, we are to be joined together (reconciled) for the common purpose of praising God, fellowship with one another, and sharing the “good news” with those who are not yet part of God‘s family.

-People- Simply put, the invitation to God’s family is made available to All people. Therefore, God's family is made up of all ethnicities, cultures, and creeds of people.

-Living- This simple verb encompasses all aspects of our time on earth; whether at work, at play, or during worship. Our lives are not to be lived within the "box" of our natural comfort zones; being shared merely with those whom we have the most in common.

-In Foundational- As obedient members of God’s family we will enjoy the firm foundation like that described in Luke 6:46-48. It is important that we recognize the characteristics that make Jesus a “firm foundation” and apply them in our lives. This begins with Love. (for Him & one another)

-Truth- In John 14:6 Jesus said “I am the way, and the truth, and the life: no one comes to the Father but through Me.” In order to receive the gift of Jesus Christ we must genuinely accept this Truth. His life here was the perfect example for us to follow as disciples, that “God is Love”. Although we fall short on our own merits, through Jesus we are made “perfect” (reconciled to God and one another).

 

We are given the “handbook for abundant life” (the Holy Bible). In this handbook God reveals to us idealized instruction for an eternal life that begins at our acceptance of Jesus Christ. The components of the "U.P.L.I.F.T. Ministry” as described above are derived from this idealized instruction such as that illustrated in the Acts 2 Church at Pentecost. This is not to imply that our salvation is dependent upon whether we follow all of these idealized instructions, for Ephesians 2:8 states “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.“ However, we are given biblical indoctrination that, as believers, our faith is justified (made complete) through works (James 2:14-24). A clearer interpretation is that through our fruitful works, Christians are shown to be righteous before God and men. In the original Greek context of the NT, the words most commonly used were ergazomai (verb) and ergon (noun). In translation, these words call attention to an action as something that stands in contrast to inactivity or talk. Therefore, in relation to ethnic-group reconciliation, we are not to just preach truth, yet continue in the current state of division within “the body of Christ”. As simple a premise as it may be "people must see it before they can experience it." There are those who question the validity of this claim by referencing the Genesis story in which God purposefully scattered His people by introducing differing languages (known as "the Tower of Babel"). There are also those who cite that Minorities and Whites in America never had harmony/unity to be reconciled. Lest we are reading different bibles and believe in a different Savior, before the fall when man was united with God and one another there was only one man (Adam) and one woman (Eve) who formed the family from which we all descended. Christ then came to provide the atonement under a New Covenant for ALL mankind.

 

The U.P.L.I.F.T Ministry is purposed to help relay the message that the Gospel offer of salvation by faith entails substance beyond the evident pardon. There is also the transformation through which God declares us as sinners righteous. Throughout our lives God acts to make us what he has declared us to be (known as sanctification). If we lack genuine engagement with the human diversity that exists in cultural and ethnic variety within "our family", important insights about God and his creation go undiscovered. Reconciliation (to God and man) is a key characteristic that distinguishes a church as being a member of the community of faith in Jesus Christ as opposed to a religious organization formed by and for the purposes of mere men. May we be obedient to his call?

 

-How many “Races” are there anyway?-

 That we even use the term “race” speaks volumes for the devil’s strong-hold on our educational system; and the fallacies that we have allowed to construct our intellect. The Bible tells us quite clearly that All humans are descendants of one man (Adam) and one woman (Eve). This realization alone should be enough to erase the “race” derived labels man has used in distinguishing people-groups based on physical characteristics; at least within the Christian family. The fact of the matter is that if all humans who have ever lived since the flood were not descendants of Adam, then our entire Christian belief would be in vain. This is especially relevant to the Gospel, as Jesus had to be a descendant of Adam to replace him as the “new head” or “the last Adam”. In this replacement role Jesus lived a sinless life and was able to pay the penalty for sin that the fallen-man (the first Adam) brought on man-kind. The biggest hurdle that Theologians face when trying to explain the origin of man-kind biblically is explaining the brother-sister marriages that would had to have taken place between the sons and daughters of Adam and Eve in order for there to be any descendants at all. The skeptics use God’s law prohibiting such marriages as the basis for their critique. However, the reality is that this law wasn’t given until 2500- years later.

 

Although the aforementioned information is based on faith in the Biblical word, even science proves the “race” distinction to be fallacy. All human beings in the world today are classified as Homo sapiens sapiens. Biologically, scientists admit that there is really only one race of humans and that “Race” used in its modern sense is a social construct derived mainly from perceptions conditioned by our history. Unfortunately, there also exists the strong influence of Darwinian evolution; which is still the primary study of human origin taught in our American school system today. Darwinian evolution is inherently a “racist” philosophy, teaching that different groups (“races”) of people evolved at different times and rates from ape-like ancestors. Therefore, this teaching would suggest that some humans are much less developed or “evolved” than others on the evolutionary continuum. This influence resulted in many people today and throughout our history, whether consciously or subconsciously, developing ingrained prejudices against certain other ethnic-groups. What more scientists are finding is that the substantial differences that set us apart are cultural, not racial.

 

Our human curiosity then requires an explanation of the differences between various groups, such as skin color, hair texture, and eye shape. The truth is, there is only a minor biological variation between various ethnic groups that create these so-called “racial characteristics”. Scientists have discovered that the basic genetic difference between two people from anywhere in the world, regardless of ethnicity, is typically around 0.2 percent. Additionally, it was found that the characteristics that many relate as major differences (skin color, hair texture, and eye shape) account for only 6 percent of this 0.2 percent variation. Therein, we find the sum differential for characteristics that have led to “racism” is only 0.012 percent genetically. Overall, there is actually more variation within any identifiable group than there is between one group and another.

 

So, rather than serving as the light that shows the way to the rest of the world; the Christian church has instead historically been on the grand stage actively perpetuating this lie.

For the couple of years that I've been able to reconnect with some old acquaintances on Facebook; and connect with many new ones I've never really taken the time to share the foundation of my ministry. UPLIFT is actually my lifelong call for which God has equipped me. This acronym (United People Living In Foundational Truth) is the basis via which I share with you my daily inspirations. It was just placed on my heart that now is as right a time as any to share the origins and mission of this ministry. Therein, over the next several days I'll be sharing the fundamentals of this ministry through several notes. Prayers and support are much appreciated as I know that the journey has only just begun...

-Preface-

A more ethnically/culturally diverse and united (reconciled) Christian presence has been a passion placed on my heart ever since I came to know Christ as a child. The fire reached a new height on April 3, 1996 when I was able to truly personally commit to and accept His salvation gift. This has been a part of my personal outreach, to help exemplify what I feel is what Christ would want to see from his children: that is ALL Christians worshiping Him and fellowshiping together; demonstrating the reconciliation He desires us to have.

I'll qualify my passion for this issue by giving a little bit of my background. I was raised in a small town (Fort Valley) in Georgia and for the majority of my life, even in today's society, have basically been faced with what many would term a "separate but equal" environment. However, the "equality" needs a reality check. Genuinely fair treatment of minorities is still lacking in many of America's institutions. While this has become for the most part legislatively addressed in secular society, this way of life in its shear essence has no place in the church. However, as a professional athlete I traveled all over the United States, and even the world, and this unfortunate mode of operation does pervade Christian churches universally. Whether perceived or actual, the face of Christian churches as "marketed" to the world will always serve as our first opportunity (testimony) to share for Whom and what we stand. In our current and predominating church environments, that message displays a bit of hypocrisy.

It must be truly disappointing to our Savior to observe a Christian asking where a good "black church" or "white church" is upon their arrival in a new city. I understand the need to find a church home where one might find a “good fit” and is able to grow in Christ. However, I don’t think Jesus gives us a pass on segregating ourselves in such a way, as has been the case amongst American churches throughout our history. It’s ridiculous to even imagine Christians in Heaven worshiping in as ethnically divided a manner as we do here in the world.

This is not a call for debate but a call to action. There are many strong and growing churches with wonderful biblical objectives. Also, I do not believe that any true Christian church is guilty of intentional segregation. However, we must be held accountable when there is no effort to change the status quo. A degree of secular progress can be seen in the fact that the first Black President in the history of our country was elected in 2008. Evident in the aftermath though is evidence of just how far we still have to go... with remnants of bigotry still evident in the pervasive assaults and critiques on every move this President makes. Within the church there have over the years been various efforts (with primarily social focuses) to move beyond our historical ethnic and socio-economic friction, and towards a more Christ-like cohesiveness (i.e. the Civil rights Movement). Unfortunately though, the dominant Christian religious establishment has historically been unreceptive.

As long as Christians continue to exhibit the church to the world as an abomination of the Christ-like character that we preach, then the value of the Gospel message is weakened by its messengers. With the world as divided as it is today, this problem within the church requires action displaying a sense of urgency. This is reconciliation activity that needs to be a part of ongoing ministry, and not just a calling when something tragic happens like on September 11, 2001; in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina; or during times of war.

If we are going to have Christians who grow towards Winning people to Christ, Training them in His word, and Sending them out to recycle the process; then we must proactively present these objectives to an ethnically/culturally diverse world, from an ethnically/culturally diverse and reconciled church.

-Purpose-

Upon approaching the subject of “racial”, cultural, or socio-economic diversity within the Christian Church, we must first identify the relevant biblical precepts.

• Any other references made to distinguish groups of people with similar physical characteristics will be referenced as “ethnic-groups” rather than the erroneously used word “race” (information explaining this often misused term will be covered later).

Jesus felt so strongly about “Christian unity” that in John 17:23 he describes this unity as the way we (Christians) are “complete” or “perfected”. Therein he also states that the world will then know that God sent Him, and loved them, even as God loved Him. Paul then describes the diversity in this unity in 1 Corinthians 12:13: to paraphrase, "that regardless of our ethnicity, or socio-economic class, we are all baptized into one body by one spirit." In the original context of the New Testament, the Greek word homothymadon (translated “together”) occurs twelve times in expressing unanimity and concerted action (Ac 1:14; 2:1,46; 5:12; 7:57; 8:6; 12:20; 15:25; 18:12; 19:29; Ro 15:6). Within these verses are images of the church praying, worshipping, and reaching decisions together. This unity exists through our union with Jesus Christ.

Just as we must recognize the importance of variety in Spiritual Gifts within a healthy Christian church (1 Corinthians 12), we must take heed to the other diversities contained in this our “one body” and the method in which God chose to distribute honor (vs. 24,25), “so that there may be “NO” division in the body.” We are given no exception for ethnic-group, position, class, etc. The Church should in its God ordained unity be diverse and representative of His kingdom, as it is in our common commitment to Jesus that He shapes us to live in harmony with others in the community of faith. When we combine these biblical truths with the much quoted observation made by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. & Dr. Billy Graham that “11 A.M. on Sunday morning remains the most segregated hour in America’s week”, we know that as Christians we have much work to do in the area of ethnic-group reconciliation and unity.

When God first placed this ministry need on my heart I initially felt that I should tread cautiously. However, through my continued growth as a Christian and increasing knowledge of the life of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, my approach has since concentrated solely on biblical-correctness administered in love; rather than political-correctness that appeases the masses. Unfortunately too many Christian churches have used out of context scripture to set legalistic guidelines for their parishioners. Most often the benefactor of such obedience is the financial bottom-line of the churches; rather than sprouting fruit through sharing the true Gospel message. Thus, the title of U.P.L.I.F.T Ministry best defines the focus of this cause: “United People Living In Foundational Truth.”

The purpose of the "U.P.L.I.F.T. Ministry" relative to the church is to provide a multi-cultural training and resource center for current and prospective church members to build a more ethnically diverse and unified church presence demonstrating biblical reconciliation in their daily lives. To acquire this, our mission must be “to nurture our members to become the most Christ-like disciples they can be so that our outreach will cross ethnic and socio-economic lines.”

It is through this mission that we will see the literal definition of this ministry’s title come to light. The verb “Uplift” is given the following definition in Webster’s dictionary: “to raise or lift up; to improve the social, economic, and moral level of a group or of a society.” What better “Uplift” is there than Jesus Christ? When this becomes our church model, we will establish a contagious enterprise that truly aims at drawing “All” people to Jesus Christ.